All life is a blur of republicans and meat

Good morning, gentle reader, and welcome to my insufferable blog. I must admit that I have created this site merely to honk off my coworker, DTM, who proudly paraded his spanking new blog to the masses yesterday while I was taking a well-deserved personal day. Still, it's probably some kind of blog faux pas to NOT mention his blog, which you can find under whywontyougrow. So if you're not too upset about the lack of naked Daisy Duke lookalikes rolling in fresh hay, you might want to check it out.

By the way, the title of this blog has to do with my obsession with quilting and chickens. Also, the title of this essay, (brought to you with Olympics-like fervor and international comradery) all life is a blur of republicans and meat, is ripped off from an old Zippy the Pinhead postcard, much like Quincy Carter was ripped off the Dallas Cowboys for, well, isn't he just too human? 1, Let those without sin cast the first stone into Hurricane Alex, I say, and 2, bring on your doom, 3, I thought Ralph Fiennes was pretty hot in that one movie.

Because I haven't entered my personal information, some of you might be wondering what I look like, and what kind of personality I possess. I have the springiness of Anastasia Myskina, the brute strength of Mary Kay Letourneau, the ligaments of Lindsay Lohan, and the polished subtlety of Rick James, though I lack his mega millions. Did I mention that I will be in NYC for the Republican National Convention? I will, dear reader, I will.

Good day!