The Long and . . . Long Road
More commuting fun. But I'll wrap it up quickly.
Lulurule #1 Old people and stay-at-homes should stay off the roads until those of us who MUST be on the roads--going to work--are at work or back home. This gives them from approximately 10 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. to drive and go to the store and get all of their many chores done. From 7 p.m. until about 5:30 a.m., the road is for everyone.
*Addendum: If you are old or a stay-at-home and MUST be on the road during restricted hours because that was the absolute ONLY time that you could get in to see the doctor (and was it really the "only" time, or were you just not trying hard enough? Hmmm?), for God's sake drive the speed limit! Just because you have nowhere pressing to be doesn't mean that the rest of the world doesn't have to be somewhere--usually somewhere they don't want to be. And don't give me that crap about what a safe driver you are because you drive an average of 45 in a 55 (what--no cruise control on those Buicks?)--I've seen you. You don't signal. And you could have a heart attack at any time, leaving you only with your cataracts-the-size-of-glaciers to get you safely off the road.
Lulurule #2 Same thing at the grocery store. Don't go to the store at 4:45 p.m. when you have all damn day to be at the store! Chances are that I've just left work, picked up my kid, driven through the bank, waited at McDonalds for a happy meal, and then realized that we have no milk and the kid will whine the next morning if he doesn't have milk for his long commute into school, and I feel that heavy, oppressive obligation to go to Kroger and pick up some milk and a few other fresh groceries, meaning I have to unload and then reload the kid--again--and fight with all of the other worker bees who have similar duties, and I don't want you in my way, too.
That's all! : )
Lulurule #1 Old people and stay-at-homes should stay off the roads until those of us who MUST be on the roads--going to work--are at work or back home. This gives them from approximately 10 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. to drive and go to the store and get all of their many chores done. From 7 p.m. until about 5:30 a.m., the road is for everyone.
*Addendum: If you are old or a stay-at-home and MUST be on the road during restricted hours because that was the absolute ONLY time that you could get in to see the doctor (and was it really the "only" time, or were you just not trying hard enough? Hmmm?), for God's sake drive the speed limit! Just because you have nowhere pressing to be doesn't mean that the rest of the world doesn't have to be somewhere--usually somewhere they don't want to be. And don't give me that crap about what a safe driver you are because you drive an average of 45 in a 55 (what--no cruise control on those Buicks?)--I've seen you. You don't signal. And you could have a heart attack at any time, leaving you only with your cataracts-the-size-of-glaciers to get you safely off the road.
Lulurule #2 Same thing at the grocery store. Don't go to the store at 4:45 p.m. when you have all damn day to be at the store! Chances are that I've just left work, picked up my kid, driven through the bank, waited at McDonalds for a happy meal, and then realized that we have no milk and the kid will whine the next morning if he doesn't have milk for his long commute into school, and I feel that heavy, oppressive obligation to go to Kroger and pick up some milk and a few other fresh groceries, meaning I have to unload and then reload the kid--again--and fight with all of the other worker bees who have similar duties, and I don't want you in my way, too.
That's all! : )
posted by lulu | 6:39 AM
3 Comments:
Take a deep breath...
Now breathe out...
Got that?
What can I say? The commute wears on me. But I save my ranting for the blog--I'm perfectly respectful in public!
Rave on! Rage on! Rant on! I just talk a good game (breathe in...etc.), but I will beware of the Lulu Commuter Patrol cruising Route 3 in her Dodge or Chrysler or whatever. If I get clocked on your radar at less than 55, I will be in deep doo-doo like the other geezers out for a sunday drive on a wednesday. Since I avoid Kroger like the plague anyway, there I'll stand less chance of getting in your way, because I'll be chewing on my hemp granola while you scarf your happy meal.
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