Going nuts.

Work was super-annoying today, all because of other people. First, there were all the calls. Then, there were all the visitors--two groups of which were researching genealogy. No, I really don't care that your great-grandparents lived here over a hundred years ago, but I'll smile and nod and direct you to the people and places you need to see and go.

Then there were all the calls and visits about the secretary--mostly what she didn't do that she said she was going to do. And now I have to do it when they're already 1/2 ticked off. OK, fine. It's not the time out of the office that's the problem (except for all the stuff in the first paragraph). It's the time she spends IN the office that messes me up. In a nutshell, she's not getting it done and she's not delegating. I don't know where to find ANYTHING, and I need it. And the longer she hangs around, the more hindered I am. If she won't retire, she at least needs to take a leave of absence until the chemo brain is resolved--if it resolves. Yes, it's that bad!

Here's a quick example (among too many): She sent out applications for the parade. I guess this is standard, and it's fine. But the labels she is using are years old because, today, about 12 of them came back to us because the recipients had died, had moved and their forwarded address had expired, or because their business has been out of business for so long that I have never even heard of it! So, either she just sloppily slapped on a bunch of old labels, or she didn't comprehend that she was sending these things to known dead people--and she knows everybody so she would know. Either way....

Then, I picked up Stevie from school. He hadn't turned in his homework for, like, the 4th school day in a row, because he is 'too busy'. I told him--AGAIN--that academics are the #1 priority and there is no such thing as being too busy to remember your #1 priority, especially after many, many reminders.

I call his teacher and tell her that he has a bunch of homework to turn in and she asks me to read what he has and I do and she says, "I made him extra copies of X, Y, and Z and kept him in from recess so he could do them!" And it was completed and in his backpack the whole time. So I get a list from her of exactly what he needs to do and here, at 7:40, he is STILL working on homework. If you are tempted to feel sympathetic about the heaps of homework he must be languishing under, check it. He had to write two short paragraphs about books he's read--that took him 4 HOURS--and now he has to illustrate a story he's already written. But my blood pressure entered the danger zone and so did his little butt. A few minutes ago he told me he was sorry for being so stubborn. Taken aback, I asked him, kindly, where did that come from? He pointed to the frickin' Wii--he was trying to earn back some of the time I took from him! Little shit! I informed him, not so kindly, that apologizing in order to be able to play video games was really lame and nothing more than manipulation. And so we stand.

Kevin is entering the danger zone as well--trying to finish all the promised monuments before Memorial Day. He comes home to eat and help clean up a little and then heads back to the shop until at least 11 p.m. I have to deal with it although I'm not always quiet in my desperation. You might be tempted to think that we're raking in the cash as a result of all this work, but you'd be wrong. The business is in good shape by many standards--we can afford to pay the bills and the customers are pleased. But there is no take-home. No debt relief. No savings. No moving out to Hot Waffles and away from a dad (his) who calls last night in a irritated 1/2 panic because Kevin moved some pecans out of the freezer to make room for the chickens we bought and they could go moldy! And they're expensive! (You know--if they weren't free from the tree in the backyard, but I get it.) And we're both just real tired of dealing with a person who can't seem to deal with people without freaking out. Every time he does that I just want to pull my hair out because I want to live on our land so bad but we can't fucking afford a WATER supply let alone a house, electricity, and all the other stuff that we have, practically for free, now. It makes me want to have a bad habit to escape into. It's a real rollercoaster around here these days.